LITTLE THINGS!

    When I say little things trust me I am not talking about me well at least not yet anyway! But trust me I am a work in progress I am down 46 lbs today! I am crazy excited I can't remember the last time I was this close to being below 350lbs I hope by the time I have my 3 days of pig out I will be down 50lbs since starting HCG.  I know I am going to gain like 20lbs so I need as much of a buffer as I can get. 

       So as of today I am down 46lbs since starting HCG down 58lbs since Dec and I hit my highest weight in Oct. 2009 I was at 432lbs and I am down 75lbs since then, as of today.  Holy Shit! That is a lot! Wow how far I have come there was a time I would of died rather then tell someone my weight. Not any more I don't care I am working hard everyday to change that number. I do mean working by the way this is not easy it is a choice everyday about everything I do and eat! But it is worth it the little things add up to big things!

       You know here is the crazy part as I went up in size I don't think I noticed the world changing and that I was not fitting any more. I was just making little adjustment here or there and bam!  Next thing I know I don't fit into the world anymore.  And boy of boy can a fat person justify, the stupid restaurants booth are getting smaller, hello stupid ever think they are staying the same you are getting bigger no, no, no. couldn't be.  The world is so against fat people.  Ha!  Don't get me wrong I do think that it would not hurt to be a little more accommodating to large people but, I also know I have to take some of that on me. 

    It is just so weird to feel things in the world getting bigger, as I get smaller.  Now I know as my brother says lets face it I am still a big girl. But I am really feeling the difference.  Just 46lbs and I can feel my world changing it is such a thrill.   It was so crazy the other day I had to take the dog to the groomer and somehow that little dog knew she was off to a bad place.  As I was driving her, she was having her little doggy moment an was crying an whining she came an got on my lap an was just like hey why- why do you hate me don't do this, please lol,  Ok so I know my Daphney can't talk but all you dog people know you just know what your dog is saying right? Lol But stay with me pass my crazy dog lady moment.  Did you catch that she came and sit in my lap while I was driving I know that does not seem like a big deal but, I looked down and no. 1. I saw my lap around my shaking little dog of course (hehe) but I saw my lap, and the dog was sitting on my lap between me and the steering wheel.  OMG I was so happy. I know that is stupid but I am telling you it is the little things. I have not been able to sit in my car with out my guts touching the steering wheel in I can't tell you how long.   WHEW HEW ! 

     Then while on the car subject I was driving my moms car and her seat belt fit me.  Now you need to understand in my moms car in the past the seat belt fit but it hated me it would try and strangle me and it would lock in place and not let me move, plus the steering wheel I had to lift it to fit under it.  Yes as a large girl in a small world you learn to adapt to these things.  But I am here to say, I fit I fit I fit.  The seat belt has forgiven me for whatever prior problem it had and no longer is tyring to kill me and I now fit behind and under the steering will with out an adjustment.  It is so exciting. 

   Plus brace your self I can now cross my legs.  I know that does not seem that big of deal but I am telling you it feels good to be able to do that.  I cant remember when I got to the point that I could not do it anymore.   I am just saying little things they add up to make a big difference.      So here is to the little things for this big girl, in this small world!      TTFN  Chan