Hello my friends,
It has been awhile since I have been on here. Life has been a little up and down lately and honest I have just not been in the mood. lol But hey it is my blog and I have that option.... lol So lets see to catch you up, I have been on maintenance for the last 60 or 65 days or so. I started it on May 16th I was at 342.4 lbs. I stayed on maintenance until July 25th when I started my 3rd round of injection at the weight of 333.8 lbs and now I am on day 6 and I weighed in today at 322 lbs bringing me to 110lbs since my largest weight and 81lbs since I started HCG in Feb. I am pretty proud of myself.. If I say so myself I am off to a good start with this 3rd round. I think it was good to go off the shots for a few months to reboot, this time around is more like round 1 I am losing pretty steady and not hungry and my motivation is in place also.
Now to keep it real like I like to do, I have other working motivations also No 1 is my my grandma. Recently my grandma passed away. The last real conversation I had with her was about my weight loss. I went to visit my grandma about 3 weeks before she passed away. My parents called and they said she was not doing to well and asked if my brother would come out and check on her because he uset to be a EMT, so we went to RushValley and I knew then that was the beginning of the end. I knew that day she was saying goodbye, she looked at me and said promise you will keep going, you look so good. I said I am grandma I am not giving up. She told me how good I look and she loves me and to keep going I said over and over I will. I had an over whelming feeling it was coming. I know she was 100 years old but she was my rock and my foundation. My hero, I looked up to her for everything. The next time and the last time I seen my grandma she was in the hospital a week latter, and not doing well I told her I love her and I would see her soon. She was pretty bad off not talking much in and out of sleep I was there when they gave her a blessing. I did not think she would make it home from the hospital but she did. but sadly due to my own stubbornness I did not see my grandma alive again. I keep putting off going to visit her because even through I keep thinking you need to go see her. I would not allow myself to go because I knew if I did it would just be to say goodbye and I was not ready. But she did pass soon after. Leaving me with the last conversation I had with my grandma is me promising I will not give up. And I will not give up. I am doing this for me but now I am also doing it for my grandma because it was my last promise I made her and I know she is looking over me and will help me if she can. And that brings me comfort, and motivation. I will not let her down. I have been doing this for my self but if there is anyone worth doing it for it is her. I love you grandma and miss you !!!
ok then now that I brought everyone down, and bummed myself out, lets move on to my funner motivation...
Boys , boys, boys, boys, boys and oh yeah boys... lol So lately I have admittedly felt like a bit of a player. Which is exciting and new for me. I have several guys that I have been trying to connect with. I thought I had my shit together and I was pretty proud of myself. I had 1 boy that I call and text he is just some eye candy that is fun to play with, he is only 21 but he is beautiful, but lets face it to young so he is just a boy toy fun to play with... then there is my booty call boy, now that is fun, we are both on the same page we meet have sex, and text each other from time to time and it is what it is, I don't want a boyfriend he don't want a girlfriend it works. Then I meet a guy that was and is true dating material, but I feel like a superficial bitch because although he is a nice guy, I think could I do better and beside he does not pay enough attention to me. Please don't start to hate me this is all new to me, I am just rolling with it. I am also turning into a bit of a promiscuous girl , I have had 2 , one night stands in the last 3 months. I am here to say that is so not me, What the hell am I thinking. Now I have a hottee and he asks me to be his girlfriend.. what the hell... But it give me motivation to keep going and lose this weight for sure.
I am loving my possibilities and it is crazy that I lost a 100lbs and my life just turns upside down.. I am loving it. It is exciting.
Plus about a week ago I went to California with my family for a week, we went to LegoLand, SeaWorldomg. I just did not think I was going to make it. My back was killing me I seriously thought at that point that I was bound to have a heart attack at any moment. I knew then I needed to do something. So for me to be able to say I am doing it I am so excited...
So I think that about sums it up for me now. I lost 110 lbs as of today, I have become a bit of a player and not sure yet if I am ok with that I am having a good time I have had several guys coming around now, I have a hottie on the line and it might be more time will tell, but lets face it I have only known the guy a week lol sad really ... ok so I am going to keep going for me and my grandma and boys that maybe waiting to get to know me. hehehe (jk) Anyway I am out for now !!! TTFN Chan
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